The curse of low self-esteem is the transference of love, in particular, self love.
When you do not truly love yourself, with the unconditional love a mother has for her children, the consequences are the manifestation of neediness and often result in the misfortune of one sided or contrived love.
This is not healthy shared love but an hour glass on it's side with all it's contents static. Thus growth that comes with the passing of time remains frozen.
When you truly love and respect yourself, then and only then, can you be ready to recognize and judge your true reciprocal and soul mate.